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Tuesday, 30 July 2013


I spoke with SmTn today. Not inappropriate on its own. Not inappropriate at all, is it, talking to friends you haven't spoken to in over a month? How about a friend you missed who admits to missing you? It's not inappropriate to say "I missed you" except when you say "I hope it is not inappropriate to say (why would it be?), but I have missed you some times."

How about a picture, the only picture of my recent trips that included me (well, not just my knees as I took a picture of my view from the grass) where I tell him the back story and he goes "if I may say, you looked beautiful :) "?

Compliment? PANIC! Is he supposed to say that? Is it wrong? Do I, really? Come on, I know I *tried,* it was the theatre, but it's also a sweaty mess... Do you really think so? But he's the only person I take compliments from! It's wrong not to say anything back, though, isn't it? He's just being nice (isn't he always?).

"thanks for the compliment"

Oh dear, is it ever harmless when a guy tells you you look beautiful? What if he fucking lives with his girlfriend? What then? Is he allowed to make an aesthetic remark? Oh, darling dear, but he's the platonic crush... it's not quite another "it's nice talking to you." (Which it always is, of course.) Shit. 

I spoke with SmTn today. Not inappropriate on its own, except for the fact that it was. 

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