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Saturday, 14 July 2012

Oh shit. Don't tell me. It's bad

Can't sleep. I've been watching Sailor Moon again. I'd tell you all about how I'm rooting for the gay couple, but EBF logged on, drunk and tells me he got drunk by himself. Which begs the question of why he didn't get even N2 to be with him on a Friday night, to which he answered they got into a big fight. I asked if he wanted to talk about it and even as I hit enter my heart sank and I just got the most horribly ominous feeling that it's bad. I daresay he might be pretty fucked up about it. Oh dear... I'm even taking a bit longer than usual to open the window with his answer.


What do you know. It fucking is that bad. Fuck. I feel for him. I really do. I'm a bit too aware of the fact that I can't be any good to him and it's killing me.

At the end of his rant, you know what he said? He apologised. He said he was sorry he put me through his drunk rant. I wanted to say "I'm sorry we're not close enough that you had to get drunk on your own and apologise for telling me anything."

Just before logging off, he said he misses our nights out having dinner and just talking. I almost stopped him before he left saying "just one last thing." I hesitated. I almost apologised for us not being that close any more. I checked myself for melodrama and he logged off before I could make up my mind about it.


Just as well.

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